One month past , losing motivation .
How can I survive for the next few months ?
I asked myself , the moment I send that msg , do I really have the will to study hard ?
Or I would just continue like last year ?
I think about it , what do I really want ?
Retain , wasting one year , going ite ?
When the teacher said stuff to make us study hard , it goes in & out .
Today , I realise , how much have I really learn this one month ?
Homework not done , delaying & delaying .
I dont wana regret on the day I take my results .
With this kind of N's result , O's is getting nowhere better .
5 months , but im left with 4 months . 4 months to pull the gap , & the rest for revision .
Can I ?
I slack for one month , other than homework , I dont even bother studying .
How long more can I go on being like this ? No more !
How far can I go on being like this ?
Its not going anyway better staying put .
I was real happy when I promote , saying I will study hard .
But where is the motivation ? Its gone gone gone !
The easiest topic , I can fail .
Yes , a lot of careless mistake , if not I could have pass .
But that isn't a excuse for me failing such an easy topic .
Forgot to write this & that , I should have knew I must write .
So what if I know how to do it ? I still failed . So what ?
Its the result that is more important afterall .
In school , in front of others , all these doesn't seems to bother shihua.
All these seems to just be crap to shihua .
But deep inside , all these do matter .
Last time , it doesn't .
Fail fail lo , who cares ? But now , this shouldnt be the thinking .
& im glad , it isnt anymore .
So what if I told you , & you say I can one la .
N's you also pass liaos , study hard , ok one la .
You dont understand the feeling .
Maybe i shouldnt continue already .

I always wonder , why ? Maybe you wont know , this is about you .
But its okay . Because I wont be saying out much .
I dontknow what to say . Or what to do . Maybe like some say , Numb .

Ever since those incident , we drifted .
But I still miss this friendship .
You should have seen , im not even bothering .
Im not even talking much to you .
Sometimes , I even ignore you .
I didnt think about your feelings .
But what about mine last time ?
I dont want to rake up the past .


Nigel ; Cheerup aye !
Maybe you should have know , its a matter of time it will end when you started with her , at your age . If this offence you , im sorry aye .
I dontknow what happen , but I understand , the feeling sucks .
To lost someone you really love . Cheerup aye .

Im lazy to type already . Bye .